Here's to You Muh Dear

This post is for Eva.

Roommates are good things...Good roommates are even better. I realized on one of our last nights together that Eva is so much more than my crazy newfie roommate...She's my friend.

I came home completely stressed out about school, papers, exams and not understanding systematic theology. I had tried to study at school but it was too distracting. I needed some quiet and peace. I walked home to burn off some anxious energy but it didn't really help. When I got home it wasn't quiet. I went to my room, sat down and tried to figure out if I really wanted to take the test in the morning - I weighed my options. I couldn't take the stress any more. I didn't care if I failed!! I didn't care that I had spent all that money on the coarse. I was on the downward spiral and my pinpoint of light was about to go out.

I decided to call my mom because sometimes just hearing her voice calms me...It didn't help...Just made it worse this time. I couldn't let her and dad down but I couldn't see how I was going to be able to do it. I was a wreck by now, tear-stained cheeks and puffy, red eyes, I went out to put the phone back in its cradle.

In the kitchen I knew I had a decision to make...Would I go into the living room and tell Eva or would I tough it out on my own? I went into the living room and gave her the phone - hoping that she would say something and then I wouldn't have to! I am such a coward sometimes! Needless to say she noticed that I was...uhmmmm...Upset.

I was waiting for the indifference...It never came.
I was waiting for the "grow up"...It never came.
I was waiting for the "what do you want me to do about it?"...It never came.

Those are the things that I always wait for...the criticism, guilt and shame of failure. What happened surprised me. I didn't expect it. What came was encouragement...what came was someone whose words lifted me up...what came was a hand to help me. We turned off the music. Eva showed me that there wasn't as much to do as I thought and encouraged me. She became my cheerleader. We split the study questions and went to work.

Eva you have no idea how much I appreciate what you did that night. I can't believe that both of us ended up actually taking the test! Thanks for being there, thanks for not being afraid, thanks for being my crazy, newfie roomie but most of all thank you for being my friend.
Love,
Kendar
to the cod!
God Bless You